You don't friggin' care. [revised entry]

Almost half-naked and desolated, I poured every sick emotion burning inside of me; I felt droplets of tears flowing tenderly on my face, I heard myself screaming all kinds of curse words, I was asking myself why and piercingly proclaiming how loser I was . I did not foresee this thing to happen, I should’ve known better than letting my heart win. Hopelessness seems to like me so much.

It’s always that one person, always that one person.

I thought you wouldn’t just stare, I thought you would do something, but you didn’t. you just frigging stare at me. Was that a nice scene for you? I didn’t want to say a word, because I thought you could do better than just making me feel worst than ever. You and the other frigging arrogant people are just the same. You and your frigging self-absorbed army.

Someday, I’ll prove I’m not worthy of all the disgust and belittlement you’re endowing on me. You’ll see, there’ll be no one else like me. You’ll see I’m not the usual stupid frigging person you thought I was. You’ll see I don’t deserve this life, especially you, who doesn’t deserve any piece of me.


But whats the point? I still love you. I still frigging care about the things you blurt on me. Does that sound good enough? That I'm being excessively dramatic because of you. The hell, I still couldn't care less

And even though, times get tough at times, I'll still be here, waiting, longing, and supporting endlessly. I wont ever have the courage to leave you. You might want to leave me, hurt me, rebuke me, or burn the bridge, but for what its worth, I'll always be the same person you've known from the start.


I have to get used to the different sides of people, the effective ways to at least guard my heart and to detach myself from any hatred. Maybe anyone of us could also learn to do that.

Lord knows I'm more than what they could ever think of. :)

You know me.


I love you.


I'll never forsake you.