The End. The beginning. How soon is now?

Time is just a concept, yet it cannot be obstructed from running so fast, today will soon become a yesterday, and tomorrow is closer to today.

It’s good to know that I have succeeded 2008, and more than that, I have ended my 17th year just fairly pleasing. My day was just another run of the mill and a very common launch of my 18th year. Received bunch of greetings from 4 kinds of group of people; valued friends and relatives, persons I hardly know, obliged individuals, and people whom I never expected would remember. January 6 has always been my favorite day of the year, not just because it is my birthday; but it is nevertheless the only guaranteed day in which I can see my full worth as a person, well at least for now. Half-real and half-fancy; that’s how I can describe it.

And it is now that I come to wonder about, the real essence of having to accept and to be keen on what I have become these past 18 years. History is yet to repeat itself, I know. But I do know better, apart from my countless mishaps, I suppose, it seems to me that being 18 is another leap to be more accountable with one’s choices and acts. I can now be considered as a legal individual capable of purchase and consumption of alcoholic drinks and cigars or drive my own wheel and get drunk or maybe commit crime and live my life in jail. That doesn’t sound good, does it? Ha. Ha. Ha.


Trust is often misapprehended, frequently ignored and most habitually taken for granted. But I do know two things; you can always love someone you trust though you can’t always trust someone you love. However vast your love for someone might be, it’s not always enough just to love them and forget about the ‘trusting’ part. That would prove why wives are always sneaky when they smell something fishy about their husbands. (lol) Truth is, it’s always a risk to trust someone, some find it easy to do so, but I was recurrently reminded by myself not to always take the risk.

I couldn’t get a grip of my schooling; I am constantly dazed, probably lethargic and just plainly miserable whenever I look at my alarming school works. Massive holiday hangover, I say.


Anyway, 2009 hasn’t been cruel as of now; although I’m still on the verge of sudden collapse, its like I’m always in seek for reasons why I should continue breathing. I hate how I mess up things when it could’ve been the same good. Too sensitive, I agree. Don’t blame the girl who doesn’t usually do the “giving” part but is now so because of someone’s power to wane her pride.


Lucky for me, it’s just the beginning, another stress comes after another, hope to God I would come out alive. Goodnight earthlings.