Under-repair.

Each time I try to think it over, I know I am ok, but I feel bad. Is love really a state of mind? Cause if it is, Can I just bump my head on the wall and disregard the whole thing? Darn. Drama strikes again.

But you know what, love itself is very confusing. They say love is worth fighting for, but why is it that on the other hand, love is letting go? They say love makes you weak, but some says it shall make you strong. Love is the happiest feeling in the world yet the worst feeling of agony. Too much contradiction, too many words, too many definitions and in the end, its bewildering.

I am bewildered by the facts about love, but I do think that love is both and in between. It is in the person to define what love is for him/her as long as it feels right and as long as it makes them happy, am I getting this right? =) Anyway. I’ll detach myself from this dramatic blah-blah.

Saturday was great, I had fun with this Modeling thing we had at our Personality Dev’t subject. More pics at MULTIPLY. =)



I never expected that I could even have an award for it, I mean the heck! I’d rather take the written exams than do that thing. But unfortunately, we must all participate since it is only held at the classroom. Oh well, at least its over though. Haha. I woke up early just so I could fix myself (my hair in particular, love the curls by the way) haha. And I’d have to help my best friend after that so I really have to wake up early. Haha.

Na-late pa kami, pero it was worth it, masaya naman e. hehe. =)

Ayun, after school, punta SM M. And darn the weather was so bad. Not to mention the heck name BAGYONG HANNA. Hahahaha. I laughed so hard when my friend told me “ui kaw pala bagyo ngayon ha”. And one friend also “ei disaster ka!!” and “sige laksan mo pa para walang pasok” as in, Wow naman diba. Ako ba ung bagyo!? Haha. Crap. Parang tanga lang eh. Wrong spelling naman. Hahaha. ;)) Anyway, lafang lang sa Kenny roger’s with my pals, ryan, ez and joana.

And after that we went home, and I found myself at bed until 6 pm. ;) Haha. Super tired. One week passed without any sign of him, one week of hearing all the silence from him. I keep asking myself why am I feeling this way and what could I do about it. I mean, why? Masaya naman ako eh. Masaya talaga. And I know he might be happy too. I know he has gone busy with a lot of things, but I don’t even know what’s up with him right now.

How will I even put closure to this? Maybe, just maybe, if he confesses that he doesn’t have feelings for me anymore, maybe then that’s the time that I could truly move on smoothly. But of course that’s not merely my point, hindi naman siguro porket love niya ko eh kaya ko siya love diba. So that’s why I’m saying, “maybe”. Maybe then mas lalo akong matauhan that everything is over. =(

Sigh

LSS.. this song truly reminds me of him.. =(

.. but now I don’t understand
.. why I’m feeling so bad now
.. when I know it was MY IDEA
.. I could’ve just DENIED the truth and lied
.. but why am I the ONLY ONE
.. standing STRANDED on the
.. SAME GROUND?

Is this how everything should end? I know you’re moving on and I am too, but how about the friendship? Aren’t you going to save it from fading? Will you ever think of it somehow? The memories, the secrets, the revelations and all that…

Argh.

I hate this. Sorry guys, this is the only place where I could let this out, no one seems to understand me right now.

Panagutan mo nga hanah. Sabi nila diba. PANAGUTAN MO. ;(
sad, but i really think I SHOULD..=(